时尚双语:李开复致女儿的一封信(4)

Do your best in classes, but don’t let pressure get to you.Yourmother and I have no expectations for your grades. If yougraduateand learn something in your four years, we would feelhappy. YourColumbia degree will take you far, even if you don’tgraduate withhonors. So please don’t give yourself pressure。Duringyour last fewmonths in high school, you were so happy because therewas littlepressure and college applications are finished. But inthe past fewweeks, we saw you are beginning to worry (did you knowyou biteyour nails when you are nervous?). Please don’t be worried.Theonly thing that matters is that you learned. The only metricyoushould use is that you tried. Grades are just silly lettersthatgive the vain people something to brag, and the lazypeoplesomething to fear. You are too good to be either.

最重要的是在大学里你要交一些朋友，快乐生活。大学的朋友往往是生命中最好的朋友，因为在大学里你和朋友能够近距离交往。另外，在一块儿成长，一起独立，很自然地你们就会紧紧地系在一起，成为密友。你应该挑选一些真诚诚恳的朋友，跟他们亲近，别在乎他们的爱好、成绩、外表甚至性格。你在高中的最后两年已经交到了一些真正的朋友，所以尽可以相信自己的直觉，再交一些新朋友吧。你是一个真诚的人，任何人都会喜欢跟你做朋友的，所以要自信、外向、主动一点，如果你喜欢某人，就告诉她，就算她拒绝了，你也没有损失什么。以最大的善意去对人，不要有成见，要宽容。人无完人，只要他们很真诚，就信任他们，对他们友善。他们将给你相同的回报，这是我成功的秘密——我以诚待人，信任他人（除非他们做了失信于我的事）。有人告诉这样有时我会被占便宜，他们是对的，但是我可以告诉你：以诚待人让我得到的远远超过我失去的。在我做管理的18年里，我学到一件很重要的事——要想得到他人的信任和尊重，只有先去信任和尊重他人。无论是管理、工作、交友，这点都值得你参考。

Most importantly, make friends and be happy. College friendsareoften the best in life, because during college you are closertothem physically than to your family. Also, goingthroughindependence and adulthood is a natural bonding experience.Pick afew friends and become really close to them – pick the oneswho aregenuine and sincere to you. Don’t worry about theirhobbies,grades, looks, or even personalities. You have developedsome realfriendships in high school in your last two years, sotrust yourinstinct, and make new friends. You are a genuine andsincereperson – anyone would enjoy being your friend, so beconfident,outgoing, and pro-active. If you think you like someone,tell her.You have very little to lose. Give people the benefit ofthe doubt;don’t stereotype and be forgiving. People are notperfect, so aslong as they are genuine and sincere, trust them andbe good tothem. They will give back. This is my secret of success –that I amgenuine with people and trust them (unless they dosomething tolose my trust). Some people tell me that occasionally Iwould betaken advantage of. They are right, but I can tell you thatthatloss is nothing compared to what I gained. In my last 18yearsleading people, I have realized that only one thing matters –togain the trust and respect of others, and to do so, you needtotrust and respect others first. Whether it is for management,work,or friendship, this is something you should ponder.